March 10th, 2017 – 12:01am PST:
Today is part eight of the story arc! This week it was pointed out to me that Rabaldus’ teeth are exceptionally white and well taken care of, considering he’s a possum and all. Point taken, sir, point taken. The appropriate changes have been made, to accurately depict a life of eating trash and gnawing bones. Please forgive this humble artist a minor gap in “realism”.
I’ve found that Rabaldus is both challenging and fun to write dialogue for. You might say “Geez, Jonathan, he’s just a goddamned possum, how difficult can it really be?”. Well, it may surprise you, actually. He’s a creature of habit, born in the wilds and currently squatting in a poorly maintained server room. He’s still trying to figure out human mannerisms, but he’s got ambition. He’s motivated to succeed, and to avoid looking like a fool. I can identify with that. Maybe you can too. To draw a comparison, I would say that although I love steak, I’m far from an expert on the higher end cuts of meat. One time I found myself at a truly high end steakhouse– my first time, really. I’d assumed I was, you know, somewhat knowledgeable on the subject. A foolish assumption, in retrospect. Things were going fine until the waitress arrived with a three tiered tray of different types of salt. That’s when I knew I was fucked. I could only stare in horror as the minute differences of each type were explained, knowing full well I was truly out of my element. I realized, in that moment, that I’d soon be expected to choose the “appropriate” salt for the type of steak I’d selected. Mistakes were made, but I maintained composure to the best of my ability. You see, I felt very much the dumb guy from the south whose knowledge of steak was limited to smoked sirloin and cheap, cafeteria quality Salisbury steak. Not to give too much away, but Rabaldus will soon find himself in similar circumstances: eager to achieve, yet painfully aware of his ignorance. There’s nobility in that, I think. Career success isn’t about doing everything right and never making a fool of yourself. It’s about swallowing your pride, looking like a moron, then calmly and politely asking why everyone is laughing so hard at you.