MY WEEKEND SELF

It’s not a true antique store experience unless I feel uncomfortable at some point.

So what did it this last time?

This weird little number:

I have to admit… we artists are a weird bunch.

Were the lights in there less bright, you’d likely have seen my intrigued/revolted expression in the glass.

You realize someone slaved over the creation of that? Look at the tiny key on the nightstand! Look at the candles! See the tiny silver knife? And the fine trim on the wooden base???

It costs $135.

Just think, for a mere $135 you can own something that will make anyone on earth grimace immediately upon seeing it.

There was also a brass suit of armor fitted for… get this… an ARMADILLO.

I don’t know if it’s creator had a strange sense of humor, or if it was common to ride out into battle with his/her pet armadillo, but either way, I was deeply impressed.

I also saw a strange statue, of a strange cat-zebra-man-thing.

I stared at it for several minutes, unable to put my finger on exactly what it reminded me of.

And then it hit me like a sack of goddamned potatoes.

Notice the slouched back, the skewed facial hair, the vaguely benign expression, plus those glazed eyes…

…that’s my motherfucking weekend self right there.

…in zebra-cat-man form, mind you.

He was $9.

An effigy of my weekend self would have cost $9, had I wished him to reside forever within my home.

I’ve piled on some more content to the meme dump. That section’s getting a little bloated, but man, I’m loath to trim it down.